Dreams come true?

Am I supposed to be glad that my exams are over now?

Actually, for some reason, I already felt liberated a few days ago, even though I know I have one more exam. That might explain why I can't concentrate on Econs since then.

After exams, I went straight to Empire for the Study in UK exhibition with my parents. I think that was when I started to feel depressed all over again. The course I want are all graphic-related. Unfortunately for me, I don't take Art for A levels, and most of the Unis require that. One even suggested I take 'Fashion Marketing' if I'm still interested to do the Arts course. The best reply I could give was a forced smile before I said "Thank you" and went away.

Then, we went to this Scholarships Department booth. My mum and the guy talked about scholarships, and it made me feel like the chances of me taking that course became thinner. After my mum told him my A Levels subjects, Physics, Maths and Econs, he immediately suggested me to take up Accounting, or Engineering or whatever. Apparently, my subjects are "very strong" and those courses would fit me well. I wanted to tear up in laughter at that point. My subjects may be strong, but that doesn't mean I'm not weak in them. I'm just not cut out to be in the subjects I took up, and I only realised this once I got into PU2.

Honestly, throughout the year, most of the time, in class, my thoughts are "what am I doing here?" Not to mention that scholarships require at least 240 tariff points and I'm not even anywhere near the confidence to even have a C in my A Levels. Sometimes, I wish I was as brave as those characters in the movies and make a difference for myself, but that's not how it works in the real life. Or maybe I'm just a coward. God knows what.

For now, I'm just going to have fun with Photoshop for as long as I can, because as of now, I feel like I'm on the right path to become one of those drones who, in 20 years time, might think about how she wished she made the right choice during that one period in her lifetime, which she could have, if not for the many restrictions in reality.

Dreams come true?

Only when you got the right qualifications to even be considered, baby.

Bullshit.