Saturday, April 28, 2007

Yes, Life?

Yesterday was payday, as we all know. Usually, it will be like any normal day for me. But yesterday, my mum made me do some chores, which is cleaning the house and rearranging the flower pots, since my dad is coming back in two, three more days. Which I didn't do nicely. Like my mum said, it still looked the same. LOL yeah, well, what did she expect? Cleaning and rearraging is not my thing. I would've appreaciate it had she just gave me the job to decorate/decorate out front lawn. And that is, just that. Just the planning. Or someyhing which doesn't really require all the boredom. -_-;;

Well, my mum was however, nice enough to bring us to the mall for lunch, since we have not any proper lunch ever since dad went away. I didn't like my food, but whatever. After that, mum gave me $100 and an hour for me to do whatever I want. So, what did I do? I got myself a brand new haircut, AGAIN. Short. Haha. And new specs. Well, my mum made me get new specs. I'm gonna miss the old ones. :( Well, obviously the money wasn't enough, so, mum gave extra money for the specs. She was the one who wanted it anyway.

Oh yeah, my sister said I didn't looked tanned like my friends after the sports day. There was also no line, the one covering our skin with tudong and our expose skin, lol, basically, I still look the same. Is that supposed to be healthy? I mean, amount of melanin doesn't seem to change that much. o_0

And apparently, the reason I sweat all the time, particularly on my palms, no matter how cold it is, or whether I was just standing still, aws because I have too many sweet stuff. I didn't know that. I thought the negative feedback for high level of blood glucose level is the insulin/glucagon thingie. Or did I receive wrong information? Haha, no idea.

Lalalalalalala I shall be busy for the next few days due to a bio presentation. Hmmm, haven't had any presentations since the past few months.

And last night, woohoo. Common heated argument between Nash and Man. But last night, I was involved. He is sarcastic. I became sarcastically happy as well. Manda just watched from the side. Mister, you need some love and trust.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

MS Annual Sports Meet

So I came.

It was frickin' hot.

Hulubalang strikes back.

Okay, lets start all over again. I arrived right after the national enthem, feeling lost, and hence cursing along the way to the field, 'cos I can't find my classmates. And so, I did. Blablabla warming-up, which no one really did.

And then, marchpass. And theat was when I started to get pissed off. Why? Lylah said where we were standing was a perfect view, which ended up as a not-so perfect view because I couldn't see Pahlawan clearly. Am I over-reacting? Guesso. But all I did was keeping on smiling when both Nisa and Lah tried to calm me down. In the end, I convinced them that I was just tired and sleepy, not angry anymore (Yeah right -_-). So anyway, some time after that, the anger faded away by itslef and we began to have fun. Screaming. A so-called kiai practice. Though I prefer calling it screaming. Seriously, man, it did not hurt my stomach, it hurts my throat. I can feel it 'til now. LAWLLL Honestly, I am not the screaming type of person, but somehow, the heat got into me today, and I was screaming like hell. I even screamed "supporting words" to my teachers who I am sure when they come to remembering this day again, they will be quite surprised with this student's hyperactivity who was normally a quiet, timid lil girl in class. GAAWWWDDDD now I regret feeling so hyper. Haha malu ku ehh

Oh yeah, on the bad side of things, I heard some Phalawans cheated. This is a huge humiliation for the Phalawan House. It wasn't really confirmed, but Kaza was pissed off when she didn't get her silver medal for the 4x100 relay. Some other Pahlawans claimed the medal. Fuck those cheaters. I was mad too, c'mon, Kaza ignored her injured thigh to get a medal, and this is what she gets? I can feel it in her punches, when I said she can release her anger by punching me. It hurts, dude. I needed some wake-up call too from that. So both of us got what we wanted. Well, not exactly, I was still mad, she was still mad. They went from one teacher to another but NO ONE cared. Seriously, if being a Pahlawanian sucks like this, then fuck it. Oh yeah, I;m sure the cheaters were either Form4s or form 3s, 'cause that's the category Kaza is competing in. So bitches, wait 'til the day comes, and you WILL receive retribution for what you just did. And I cannot believe how careless the teacher were. What the fuck is up with that? And how come the could ignore that fact?! Seriously, I really begin to not like, no, HATE WITH PASSION, my school and my sporthouse. I should've got out when I got the chance. SHEESH. Ignorant teachers, cheating students, what then? Corrupted admin officials?! I have a feeling the teachers didn't care because they were Pahlawans! Come on, just because you want to keep the champion title, you did not have to CHEAT shit out of a form-three student! Or maybe because the girls who cheated were like, the bitch teachers' pets and they're willing to sell their fucking whorebody just to get few puny medals. You can easily forge them at a $1.80 shop! Heck, I don't even think Pahlawan deserved being the first runner-up! I think everyone shiould be disqualified! Hah! See how that wuld make'em cheaters feel! Still not guilty? I suggest death sentence. yeah, we have witnesses, man!

The above part is...censored as to not ignite the anger of people who do not wish to read it.


Wow, I really feel mad. I still do. Really, really do. I wanna see their faces. Did I not say I still have some hyperness left over after the sports meet? 'Cos when I'm hyper, I do anything. So yeah, still, fuck them.

And I don't know who the teachers are, but I know who aren't, and I'm beginning to feel a little mistrust towards these cheating, ignorant, corrupted teachers of ours! Huh! Pedos! Flirting with their students just because they're friggin young and even the stdents think it's friggin cool to have those teachers backing them up.

Then, we helped some teachers since we're going home late and stuff, had a lil bit of fu. But I still feel sympathetic.

Alum gi ku puas hati bah!

It really irks me seeing students kambang-kambangan around teachers they're close to.

Oh yeah, and this particular teacher, she expects everyone to be home by 1 o'clock! Like, what the hell? Unless one has a punctual driver or a car, that'll be kinda hard. We can't just say, "Mummy, daddy, you need to pick me up at 12.30 'cos my teacher says so!" HELLO~ unless you're sending us home, stop thinking everyone has time like you, roaming round the field to prevent 'inappropriate scenes'!


So anyway, remember this dude?


I shall wait for your CD!

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

likelikelike

LikelikelikeOMGOMG I just downloaded "Which Backstreet Boy Is Gay". Now, my life is COMPLETE. Weird Al, you made my dreams come true. ANd I also found this Britney Spears parody, "Opps! I farted again!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA gross, dude, just the way I like it!

We are, on fire,
His back, perspires~

XDDDD

Yes, I just drank two cups of milo and is friggin HYPERRRR. Extra sweet. Haha

LOL anyway...yesterday, we had some kendo training right after bio, from 3 all the way til 5! I mean, c'mon! We wuz verry deppressed that we got no CCA this week, so we just did what we think we should. Haha, no, it's not a training where everybody comes along with the instructor, just some of us, who took up kendo not just to fill up the CCA form. Haha

OMG I'm likelikelike currently listening to Oppps! I Farted Again and I feel so...hahahahahaha. Seriously, recommended songs! Haha

Not that we did much, mostly, we talked. Well, it was kinda like free training, where we get the chance to improve the cuts we suck atttt. I still can't corrent my Do! Hahahaahahahahahahahahahahaha

Oh yeah, yesterday, during Econ, Sir showed this video presentation of his Form 4 students, and LAAWWWWL they're good. All of the actors were guys, so yeah. GAY ATTACK! Seriously.

Anyway...emm...yeah. Hahaha...emm..nothing serious to talk about. Wait, there is, but I don;t really wanna ruin my hypernessss.



WHICH BACKSTREET BOY IS GAYYYYYYY~~

Ok, we're all gay...

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Saya Suka

Saya berasa sungguh mengantuk pada waktu ini, tetapi saya tidak mahu tidur lagi, kerana saya sudah tidur lebih daripada mencukupi pada hari ini.

Seperti hari-hari minggu yang lain, saya telah menghabiskan masa saya menonton dokumentari-dokumentari bagi menambah ilmu pengetahuan am yang mungkin akan menjadi penting suatu hari nanti. Seperti kata guru bahasa melayu saya, kita harus mengumpulkan informasi sebanyak yang dapat mengenai kejadian-kejadian yang berlaku di sekeliling kita.

Saya suka menonton dokumentari.










OKAY. FINE. I HAVE GOT TO STOP TYPING IN MALAY. I CAN NOT FIND ANOTHER WORD I CAN USE IN THAT POST. BUAHAHAHAHA. THIS IS AMUSING. YEAH, MY FRIEND DARED ME TO MAKE A POST IN MALAY, SO HERE YOU GO.

One question, what is "event" in malay?

Friday, April 20, 2007

Is Needing Hands

I feel sick. And I'm sore all over. Especially the upper parts of my arm. Heh. By now, we all should now what the cause is, right? ;D

Lessee...approximately 12 more days until my dad comes back.

We learnt how to wear the hakama yesterday. Seriously, as a first-timers, even tying those knots sort of provided some kind of arm exercise with all the twists and turns. Ouch really. It's so comfortable, so...hahaha. We even tried walking around in it, twas cool. At least the hakama was not as long as I thought it would be. And when I took it off, I felt...normal again. As if my powers were taken away as soon as I remove them. So saddd. And then comes the not-so-fun part- folding it. It was complicated. In the end, I had to ask Pinji to fold it for me. We had to follow the folds and stuff, hard, man. Accuracy. Lol.

Oh yeah, training yesterday, it was...it was...gagagaga. Yazin-senpai and Lim Han-senpai came to visit us yesterday. He announced that the MS Kendo Club is one of the first schools in Brunei to have elected a captain, and two vice-captains. Or something that sounds like that. Because we passed the three-months trial. Apparently, if we survive Kendo for 3 months, we can survive Kendo for any given time. Although, I think that even if some of us wants to quit, we couldn't until the end of the year anyway, when we can renew our CCA. So, the first captain for the Kendo Club was Muiz, and Kaza and Ramzul are elected as the vice-captains. I'm not sure if I heard it right, but I thought I heard Lim Han saying we should call him Kumichou, I mean, isn't that term for yakuza bosses? LAWLLLLL But yeah, Muiz will fit that role. The yakuza boss, that is.

We also did 85 hayai suburi. Just what is that dude's problem? And I so do not like his sarcastic, evil laugh. I prefer Woody the Woodpecker's or Mandark's laugh better. He said, "I shall make you do 100 hayai suburi. HAH. HAH. HAH." Waterrrfaaarrrkkk. Yeah, I counted. I still don't know how to make the correct hayai suburi too :/

I want to scratch my back like hell, but I can't. Like I said, arms are aching. Someone do it for me!! .........I also want to play with my shinai today, but it hurts so badd. T______T Darn you, Lialialialia.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

It ends tonight, it ends tonight...

I have good news, and I have bad news, or more to sad news.

My dad went to Umrah this morning, and I didn't get to send him to the airport! He did insist me to skip school today, and I almost did. But I made a last-minute decision of going to school instead, because I hate goodbyes. Seriously, no way am I going to bawl in public, I try to avoid that. And I so do not like it if the person I'm sobbing for sees me. Yes, I have a huge ego. It's better this way, I guess. Well, would've been much better had he decided to not go at all. But then again, this is Umrah, I guess all I have to do is wait for the two weeks to end and skip school and the day he comes back. I AM SO GOING TO MISS HIM. :,( I was acting so much like a kid yesteday during the Doa Selamat we held yesterday at my house. 'Cos I didn;t want him to go. and the doa selamat was like a farewell party, and seriously, it made me SAAAD. Well, at least I got my cousins to help me hide my actual feelings. But, I really don't know why I'd feel sad because of this. He goes overseas all the time. Maybe 'cos this one is like, seriously far away. GAHHH

I still feel sad, but just let me talk about the good news. Yesterday, 17th April 2007, I finally got my shinai, an Ikken (or Iken, I unno, lit. trans: 'One Sword', according to my chinese friend), and my hakama and gi, which I wasn't exactly planning to wear, but have to, Senpai's order, and a bokken, which was ordered because of the huge amount of change we had after buying the others. Wehehehe I'm happy again. Yes, it was labeled "Made in China". I know a certain someone is happy with this. Whatever, he's just trying to cover his sadness for owning a Mushin I. But his is made in japan. Darn him. Still, whatever. I'm still trying to improve the "80% grip on left hand, 20% grip at right hand" and the "50-50 on both hands when swinging down" but it's still hard. At least this time the shinai is much lighter. Using it for Suburi practice, too. I still suck. haha It is either because of the tiled floors I have, or because I basically suck XD

Wana looked cute yesterday, "galloping" with Lylah's shinai along the corridor, with her cute kiai. Wan, this is seriously a compliment. You totally made my day. XDDDD

Sunday, April 15, 2007

SMARTER 5-hills Challenge

The 5 hills chosen were Tasek Lama, Bt. Subok, Bt. Markucing, Bt. Mentiri and Shahbandar. The 5 hills symbolises the five challenges faced by the parents of an autistic child, which are:-

  1. The challenge of our children growing up
  2. To advocate support and understanding from government agencies
  3. The challenge of academic issues
  4. The challenge of future employment
  5. The challenge of higher education

We left home at 6.30 to go to Tasek Lama for the opening ceremony. I didn't go hiking at Tasek Lama 'cos I've been there, and I feel that a one week rest from the last hike is not yet enough. While waiting for the President, Uncle malai to come down, Didi and I went to the waterfall, but was occupied by people doing Tai chi. We just went around the tasek, avoiding the more hilly part.

But you see, last two days on Rampai Pagi, Uncle Malai said that whoever climbed the hills will receive a certificate, even if it was just one hill, and I wanted a certificate. So, what did I do? I decided to go up Bukit Subok, which was definitely a bad choice for someone like me. There were so many stairs! Yeah, they built stairs, so you don't exactly feel the soil beneath your feet, which isn't really that refreshing.First it was all straight up, way way way up, then it was flat land, and then there were some gntle slopes going down, which led us to more stairs going up, and I was like WTFFFFF. We were going up and down, ENDLESSLY! Then there was this totally steep slope going down, and the steps were like, small, and my legs were trembling, NOT HELPING! I thought that was the end, but NO, it was not. When I finally did complete the round, I saw my mum laughing at me, at the base of the hill. I was definitely WTFed by then. My mum said it almost took me an hour that she called me along the way. Haha, so amateurs, and those people who are horizontally-challenged like myself, don't go there, unless you have lots of water wth you, and maybe some support. I took a pictured next to the signboard, as a proof that I did climb the hill, complete with the flushed look. And I will get a certificate. Yeehee~

In the car, I kinda had a this funny conversation with my dad.

Dad: SO, was it fun?
Me: Not a bit.
Dad: That is how it feels like to have children, even the normal ones.
Me: If raising a kid is as hard as going up and down the hills, I'd rather not have any.

Everyone else was LOLing out of their heads, but I was friggin serious, in a way. Maybe it was the exhaustion or something, but seriously, freaky thoughts were up in my mind. Like, like--

--I shall not continue that sentence.

We wnet home for a while to grab some more 100plus, and went to Markuching. Not much happned there, since when we arrived, they were almost done and we moved on to Mentiri.

Mentiri, well, obviously I did not want to do any more climbing,so I just hanged out at the rocks, daydreaming while looking at the pretty, green scenery. Didi was busy taking pictures of herslef, so I let her have her way, while I have mine. Oh yeah, we also became models for that day, posing for this photographer...maybe it was because of the SMARTER shirt we were all wearing. Well duh, we were ze family of an autistic kid. Haha

And then, there was abreak, so we took the chance to go to Hua Ho to grab some food, which Iwas kind of embarassed to the, because all of us, were wearing the sam shirt! Haha, yep, we definitelgot some stares. OF course, Iw as kind of irritated by it, so I purposely chanted loudly, "stare, stare, stare..." That made people stop staring. Haha

Then, we went to Shahbandar for the closing ceremony, there were not many people as there were at Tasek Lama. Uncle Malai arrived, he gave aspeech, then the guest of honour, whoever it was, gave a speech, then we ate. There really wasn't much to say.

But what I was seriously irratated by was the fact that it was a hot day, people just got back from running, and they were served hot tea and coffee? WTF, I know, formal blabla, but it was HOTTT. Water wasn't helping, it was not cold. Sheesh. I was dehydrated the whole day and this is what I get? yeah sure, after Bukit Subok, I tried to gobble down some Sehat water but it was ICK! Seriously, no matter how thirsty I was, I just couldn't bring myself to drink water. No idea why. I did manage to grab a few tins of 100plus, but somehow it was gone after one hour, and I was thirsty again.

Overall, it was good. I bought a few badges, and I ordered a mug. It's got a pretty design. I wanted to buy the keychains and pen, but I'll let my dad keep his money. Haha

Oh look, it's on the news!

Saturday, April 14, 2007

It's All Over

The party. the party is over. So, what do I feel about this? I didn't get enough rest today because I've been spending the whole day editing the programme, speeches, stories, straight after I got back from Balapan. At 6.45PM, we were at Aneka Rasa already, preparing the kids for the dance, as well as our own performance, which is like, lame 'cause we stole some poem from someone else. Haha.

So, how was the party? It went okay, I guess. It was not smooth, as we predicted, had some rushes and stuff, and our aunt blames us for not being able to manage the time. Fck her, we were friggin tired. It was a school day, if she hadn't noticed. We used the song "I'm Too Sexy" for the kids' fashion show, which somehow turned out to be dancing, haha. The "What I've Been Looking For" dance was the best part. We've been training them for a month, so it was worth it. Nini AKi was happy, though I;m not sure if he understood what we were talkibng about, but he had this huge grin on his face which kind of pleased us, the three organisers. I really don't want to elaborate much, too tired.

I want to talk about the sports selection. Wehehehehe. Well, obviously we only hanged out at the sides of the padang and stuff, just cheering on to our friends. Kaza got first on the 100m sprint, w0oT. Played truth or dare, lol, so many questions about "HIM" haha. After most of the events had ended, and the grandstand was kind of empty, we decided to fill in the spaces. Saw Muiz, and we chatted a hell lot about kendo, and everything related; kumdo, kenjutsu, etc. Can't wait for next kendo training.

As the time came close to 12.20, I began to get pissed off because I just remembered that my aunt forced me to go with her to the restaurant at 2, despite me suggesting 4pm, but she wouldn;t budge. I kept telling her that I'll be tired, but did she listen? No, she even mocked the banner we made. Whatever, at least she bought me an easi $10. Thank you for that.

All in all, the party was only fun during the games. Lol, musical chairs for adults. Even mum was like, dancing! WHATTERRRRRRFARK. buahahaha.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Madamada...

Few days ago, I was in the "Depressed Mode" mainly because of kendo. Last week, we kinda disappointed our senpais and they kinda got pissed off and prohibited talking, hanging out, and giggling in the dojo starting that day. The form-5 were told to come early to the dojo and clean the dojo weekly, too. It was unfair! Man, I was even considering to quit kendo if we're not even allowed to have some fun while doing it. Which was why i was kinda panicky when today's CCA is coming up. It turned out to be better than we expected.Lylah and I arrived there early, but it turns out we were the earliest, we swept the floor, and we seiza...way early. I was glad that the senpai was not in his bad mood anymore, or else I might not even take up kendo next year. So, Lylah and me decided to come early to the dojo every week and sweep it VOLUNTARILY this time. Oh yeah, when funny thing today, after out training session, and the others were gone, Lylah, Riku, Kaza and I decided to stay at the audi a little longer and practiced a little more. We also did a little 'Kiai Competition'. Our senpai was still there and he commented how our kiais were louder at that time than during training. We answered, "Because now there are less people?" Lol and he replied with a "BAKAYAROU!" in a joking way, of course. I was lolling in my head, thinking, is that how he's supposed to treat his juniors? Then I thought, maybe his japanese curse words are limited. HAHA that should probably explain it. I feel like men-cutting him for disapoointing us AGAIN about our spposed-to-have-arrived-two-weeks-ago kendo equipments. Besides, he did say we can just fight him if our equipments are not here by next week. Hehe Who's going to teach us how to wear the kendogi and hakama? *winkwink at a certain person*

Now, on to test marks. Wahahahahahahahahaha I suckkkk. Well, at least I didn;t fail anything, except maths D and A.Maths. But that's common. I failed neither of my sciences, barely got an A for my Econ, and the B.M, I got an A for the first paper. But what's the use if I fail thesecond paper? Like bio, I got a C for MCQs and structured questions, which is an improvement for me, but when the essay marks got out, FARRRRRRRK. I barely passed it. Hah, well the point is, I failed the overall marks, simply 'cos I failed Maths D. I'm proud to say that I got 5/20 for maths D. Hah. See how much I suck?

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Let's get F*cked up and die

My dad suggested me to stop listening to rock songs, and listen to nasyid instead. OH ZE HORORRZZZZZZ. Dear daddy, I can listen to nasyid, I mean, why not, no problem with that, but you can so not ban rock music from me. I'll die of stress if that was to happen. WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO CONTROL EVERY FRIGGIN THING ABOUT ME?! IT's not like I go psycho and feel like drinking blood or killing someone after listening to those songs, I don't listen to Black Metal or Heavy Metal, just...other types of Metal genres. Ones that are enough to make me feel better and not go wild and grab a knife to stab my damn lil' siblings when they piss me off. In a way, isn't that better?

WHen my dad lectures me about school stuff, religious stuff, whatever, I don't mind. I mean, I realised that that is his job as a father. But when he inteferes with my free-time hobbies, I seriously do not like it. "Stop reading those useless comics! Stop watching those unworthy TV things! Go and study! Don't listen to rock music!" Indeed, the last part hurt me the most, because music is like, my life. I felt like I was being backstabbed by one of the people I trusted most in ths whole wide world, don't ask me why, but I did felt like crying after that. I know this sounds corny, but he just made me feel like a bird in a cage, who's radio has been taken away from it, making it lonely. All I wanted to do was unwinding myself from school, although I took it a lttle bit too far sometimes, to the point of not doing my homework, but hey, home was supposed to be the place to relax, and just a tiny bit percent of school stuff to be done.

Speaking about homework, this particular teacher of mine, she is nuts. I don't want to sound mean. But it's so true. SHe likes to give us homework. A hell lot of homework. After EVERY FRIGGIN LESSON with her. So basically we get homework from her four times a week. No, make that 5, because on Tuesday, we have to see her in rhe morning and afternoon. And she would go sigh and say, "I really don't like to give you homework, but i'm sorry, I have to." ANd then she smiled with a smile so innocent it could be pasted on an angel's face. But there is nothing angelic about her. She complains about that, yet she gives way too many questions to be completed. What, does she think that she's the only teacher teaching us? If she doesn't like giving homework, she could at least decrease the number of questions. Oh yeah, especially holiday homeworks, I resent them the most. SHe gives way too much like she's the only teacher in the whole wide world giving out homework. As most of us know, this week happens to be a test week. Last monday, we had a lesson with her. Blablabla end of lesson. As usual, she'd open the textbook, but on that day, she said, "I know this week is a test week, so won't be giving any homework." OF course, I wa the most happiest, at least I can focus on revising, my heart was flying in the air, yeah, I was happy alright, this was the first time she decided against giving homework! When all of a sudden, she said, "I was just kidding. I have to give you homework." Lemme ask you, has anyone evr given a huge bar of chocolate to you, with a huge sincere smile, and when you were about to eat it, the person took it back and said, "I was just kidding."? Did you feel like hitting his head with an electrified steel bar? SO that that person will be hit and electrocuted at the same time? To make him feel how you felt? Well, I did when my teacher did that, until I was almost going to burst out crying. Utter disappointment was crushing my head to bits. I can now conclude how inconsiderate this teacher of mine is.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

bababababababa

It is 11:03PM and I have my MIB book on my left side, bio notes on my right side, and ways to write my summary in my head. Basically, I couldn't concentrate on just one thing. I am very sleepy but I won't let myself sleep until I AT LEAST finish reading through these stuff, hence the reason I'm writing this down. I have MIB and Bio test tommorow, and I have to pass up my english summary and A.Maths homework as well. Unfortunately, I left my A.Maths book at school so in these three days I couldn;t do anything fun. I like Integration. Wow, that's a first.

Can't concentrate.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA sleepy

MIB sucks. I don't wanna be the country's asset. I mean, I am not the only "belia" so go tell someone who cares. I don't do responsibilities 'cos I know I'm just going to flunk them and people will get disappointed and then it'll fill me with guilt. Don't you just hate that? It's already proven based on my frickin school results, homewroks, and heck, even family matters. I don;t understand why my parents expect me to do well in this and that, and at the same time critisizing me. Maybe they were actually trying out reverse psychology, but that doesn't really work on me. It doesn't make me feel, "Hey, if they can do it, so can I." I'd feel more like, "Oh, I suck that much, I guess I'll just quit."

Anyway, am I going to survive this topical test? Okay, some might be saying, stop sulking and go study, dammit! Somehow, I can't. No matter how hard I try, stidying is just not me. How many times do I have to say that huh? Just reading it makes me so, unenthusiastic already. But now I have to understand and remember every single bit of information just to pass these damn tests to pursue a so-called better life? I don't think so. Honestly, I'd rather do something more interesting. If only the teachers have a much effective way of teaching, I might do beter. Not some dull teacher just reading from the text, or teachers who just crack up jokes and make us laugh like hell but pour no knowledge, which would be kinda stupid.

LALALALALALALALALALALA I should just go on reading MIB since I suddenly realised that I have no idea what I just talked about, really. The sleepiness is getting into my head.